Today was the first anniversary… her mind skittered still unwilling to return to the darkest moments of her life— The knock on the door the sombre-faced police officers who didn’t need to say a word to relay their information.
The approaching bridge disappeared from view, swamped by a kaleidoscope of bitter, futile memories.
Hadn’t she left the flat to escape them, she demanded silently. Hadn’t she demanded, a year ago, her husband stay in bed ‘for one more day’?
Yes, she had! And had he listened to her? Of course not, when had Allan ever stopped long enough to listen. To consider her fears, her needs, her love. And why, she asked herself as she ran into the shadow cast by the bridge, why had she ever thought herself in love with the arrogant bastard?
She’d seen him daily for a year before he spoke to her other than to pass over his order for coffee and a bagel on his way into work. She’d lived for those moments, dreaming that one day his smile would connect with hers. That one day his heart would hear the excitement and desire when her own childish heart beat out its delirious tattoo of longing.
Tall, and the sight of his blond hair falling across his forehead and one eye, turned her stomach to mush each morning. His broad shoulders offered false promises of strength and security, his lying, laughing eyes had her believing him when, one day, out of the blue, he’d asked her out because she was so pretty and he couldn’t get her out of his mind.
Gullible, gullible, gullible fool that she’d been.
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