16 September 2014

Tuesday's Tales - Curly




Welcome to Tuesday's Tales  

This week our prompt word is CURLY and my snippet moves on a bit from last week and is from the third chapter. My heroine has one chance of evading her pursuers. Will she succeed? Find out more...


She had to make a choice. And do it now. Right or left? 

She inhaled a deep slow breath and waited for the calm to flow over her.  She guided the car into the left lane.  Five cars separated her from her pursuers.  If traffic jammed the road beyond the corner, she'd lose her one good chance of losing her tail.

The lights turned green, and the cars ahead edged forwards.  Crowds waiting to cross shuffled for position; a mother grabbed a toddler who'd stepped out in front of her.  Kate hit the break, swept a glance in her rear-view mirror, smiled when she saw a bright red sports car swerve in front of her followers, then she lifted her foot from the break, released the clutch and eased her car round the bend, and prayed..

Immediately she turned left again into a narrow alleyway. Someone upstairs had heard her prayers.  She slipped low in her seat and kept a vigilant watch on the mirror above her.  The sporty red car zoomed past, followed more sedately by a silver estate car, and a dark saloon she couldn't identify, and there!  Everything shifted into slow motion as the black four-by-four passed the end of the alleyway.

She beat back the urge to back out and race off in the opposite direction.  She forced herself to open her door and step out from the car.  She gagged at the stench of rotting garbage.  Her legs shook so much she had to grab the car door to remain upright.  Traffic noise engulfed her.  Petrol fumes mingled with stale food and rotting garbage spilling out of commercial refuse skips lining the alley walls.  She inhaled it all without a thought, gasping for air to fill lungs starved of oxygen while she half expected the black car to return.  Keeping to the shadowed side of the alley, Kate reached the street in time to see her pursuers disappearing round the corner. What of the second car? Had it gone straight ahead?

She didn't have much time before they realised they'd lost her, which meant she had to leave of the alley and away from the area.

Ten minutes later she followed the road signs to the south coast.  She needed money.  Cash!  And she needed it now, before she travelled far enough to allow her enemies to discover her destination.  She had some urgent shopping to attend to.  Within moments she pulled into a car park.  She parked in a central, easily observed spot, and, without a backward glance, headed for the shopping mall.

Families with loaded baskets passed her on their way to their cars.  Laughter and childish squeals of delight warred with fractious voices, demanding partners and offspring do the owner’s bidding.

Cheap female scent and car fumes created a heady mix she longed to escape from.  She entered the fist shop in the Mall and walked through to an alternative exit.  Within moments she found a bank and using her business account, withdrew enough cash to last her for a couple of weeks.  She hoped no one would wonder at a large cash withdrawal from her business account.  Lazily she glanced at her surroundings.  Grey-pink chairs sat on deep blue carpet, electronically controlled doors swished open and shut as people approached them.  The sound of the tellers’ voices, muffled by the security glass, hummed behind her.  A young mother with two children clinging to the handles of a pushchair entered. 

"’Excuse me.” Kate smiled at the young woman.  “I’m looking for a nearby charity shop.”

The woman hesitated, a boy with curly, ebony hair, and a girl with a blonde fall of hair to her waist, moved to cling to her legs, and they all looked as though they hadn’t eaten in a week. “Turn right, out the door, and two doors down.”

Before Kate could thank her, the little family pushed past her and joined the queue waiting for attention.
 
Thank you for reading this week's offering,
there are lots more amazing reads at
Tuesday's Tales 

16 comments:

Iris Blobel said...

Nicely done sherry. Nice tension, great descriptions. Loved it.

Sarah Cass said...

Great sense of urgency in the snippet. Love it. :)

V.L. Locey said...

Wow, that was really well done. Lots of tension as well as great descriptions!

SherryGLoag said...

Thanks Iris, :-)

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks Sarah. Glad you like it.

SherryGLoag said...

Thanks for your kind words, Vicki :-)

Flossie Benton Rogers said...

Wow, I love the way she maneuvers to escape the cars following her. Now if she can just get some bug out cash! Tension filled scene.

Jean Joachim said...

Love your descriptions of the smells she encounters and the way she gave the bad guys the slip. Very evocative writing.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Flossie, I' please it works for you.

SherryGLoag said...

Thanks Jean, I always value your comments.

Jillian said...

lovely work this week. I feel the urgency she's experiencing.

chrysnjay said...

Your suspense writing is just as well done as your romance. My stomach was in a knot. I felt like I was in the car with her.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks Jillian

SherryGLoag said...

Wow, thanks Trisha. :-)

morgan said...

Lovely job ramping up the suspense. I'm anxious to see how she transforms herself.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks Morgan, I'm delighted you want more.