This week's 'six' follows on from last week's.
* * *
“Widow? Cadmore never said anything about a wife. He introduced me to his sister. I told you he wagered his sister against my twenty thousand pounds.”
The remembered stench of the dingy room, stale beer, and dirty, sweaty bodies that fateful night pervaded Rafe’s memory. The single overhead bulb that failed to illuminate the far corners of the room hid the gray-faced stick of a woman who’d stepped forward when commanded.
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50 comments:
Great six - loved the description when he thinks back - very grim!
Whew, powerful sensory details. Great, but disturbing, visuals.
Fantastic imagery; I especially love how you've tied memory and scent. The description of the woman is haunting and tragic.
Yes I agree - scent is a strong trigger for memory - excellent
Incredibly atmospheric memories. Great job!
This is really descriptive. Excellent work. Loved the six.
Very compelling...makes me want to know more.
Liz
This is an intense scene - you show so much in these six! Great job. :)
Great description, and I like the picture you've posted alongside it.
Nice description. Wonder what else he'll remember? Good 6!
Fantastic job describing the smell and feel of the room: despair. I wonder who else was in that room. Disturbing scene but I want to read more.
Lovely descriptions. Great Six.
I love the detail of the single overhead bulb. It adds so much.
Very disturbing. A man who wagers his sister? These do not sound like men you would like to know. The woman sounds pitiful. Is she the sister? Nice hook.
Sounds like a despicable villain. The questions this six raises are a great hook. Love the picture you used to illustrate your selection, too.
"Grey-faced stick of a woman" is so vivid! I can see her stepping from the shadows. A truly sinister six!
Wagered his sister? I wanna kick his ass!
Not looking good for someone and I'm in total agreement with Graylin. He needs some serious ass kicking
Wow. Not good. And selling his sister is just - amazing. Horrifying.
Very visceral. Thanks for sharing!
Great six!
Urgh, very grim! From the sound of it, the sister probably would have been better off sold than stay with a brother like that.
You created a wonderful six, diving a very detailed image, I loved it!
lizculver, thanks for your comments and visit. I appreciate them both.
Cate, thanks for your comments. I'm glad they made an impact.
Monica Enderle Pierce thanksfor your kind words and your visit.
Thanks, Sue, for me it was easy to forget the sensory value in writing, recently.
Jessica K thanks for your kind words.
:-) Thanks Piper.
I hope you'll come back for more next week, Liz.
Zee, until I joined SSS, I admit I didn't appreciate the impact 6 sentences could have. It's one heck of a big learning curve!
Thanks Gayle Ramage
Thanks for coming by, Sandra. :-)
Thanks Dianne Hartsock I appreciate your visit.
Carrie Ann Ryan thanks for coming by.
Thank you, Lisa Fox
Casea Major you are so right, Casea Major. Thanks for coming by.
:-) Sondra, when I saw that pi, I knew I had to use it with this clip. Thanks for coming by.
Jenna, that senence eventually replaced about 1500 words of useless diescription! I'm glad you liked it.
Graylin Fox, there's a lot more to kick ass about than this, I hope you come back for more :-)
Lindsay, as you discovered last week, Cadmore got his come-uppance!
Lauri J Owen, I hope it didn't put you right off from wanting to know more.
Vivien Dean, thanks for your kind words and your company.
Jennifer Johnson, Thank you :-)
Pippa, you make a good point! Thanks for coming by.
Thanks Alix. I appreciate your visit and encouragement.
Great description - can see (and smell!) it.
Wonderful description
Thanks Paula, for your kind words and company.
Thanks, Jayel Kaye.
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