10 March 2013

Sunday Snippet 10-03-13


Thank you to everyone who visited last week and to those who left comments. Your thoughts are always appreciated.

For today's Sunday Snippet I'm continuing a little bit further on from where I left off last week.


“Do I understand the driver of the…” The officer gestured towards the remains of the sports car.  “Are you saying the driver passed you on a blind bend?”

What could he do? Jim nodded, unable to get any words passed his now frozen vocal cords. Rage ripped through him sharp as a sword. Neither of them deserved to be shielded from their own stupidity. They may not have survived, but why should he, the living victim of their betrayal shield them from the truth of their own stupid and senseless actions?

“Yes.”  Just one word. And he felt a traitor and yet still rocked by betrayal.
 
(I understand this is slightly over-long, but couldn't shorten it without losing the impact.)
 
That's it for this week, :-) Thanks for coming by and you'll find lots more free-read snippets at Snippet Sunday

26 comments:

Karen Michelle Nutt said...

Intense scene! I can feel his rage and his grief.

Great response in the example below, but make sure you add the 'm' to this powerful line!

"Rage ripped through hi(m) sharp as a sword."

Fantastic snippet! I want more!!

Gem Sivad said...

Was this a stupid "chicken" game? Awesomely powerful hook.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks for the catch, Karen, have corrected it here and on the original. I appreciate your company and comment.

SherryGLoag said...

No, Gem, no game of chicken. I've taken a true incident (where all survived!) and twisted it to suit. The idiots really did pass us on a blind bend.

Jess Schira said...

I love how your handling this scene. It's very intense and intriguing.

Brenda Ashworth Barry said...

Such an intense scene. Why would they pass like that is so intriguing and has me wanting more information. Great job on this! :-)

Kate said...

Yes, a lot of intensity here. Very well done!

Sandra Sookoo said...

Wonderfully tense scene!

Willa Blair said...

Tense and powerful. Well done!

History Sleuth said...

God the guilt the guy must feel to act like he doesn't have a clue who it is or why it happened. I keep coming back every week. Great scene!

Jane Wakely said...

Intense scene, Sherry--esp that last line! I'm looking forward to reading more! :)

Siobhan Muir said...

Wow, survivors guilt and yet vindication. Good snippet, Sherry. :)

Karysa Faire said...

Why does he feel betrayed? Great hook and I want to read more. :-)

SherryGLoag said...

Thanks jess :-)

SherryGLoag said...

Brenda, I have to say that in the actual instance they were just big headed idiots - how do i know? they were kind neighbours once removed.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks Kate.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Glad you liked it Sandra.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks Willa

SherryGLoag said...

:-) History Sleuth I'm so glad you are enjoying this. You've made my day.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks Jane.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks Siobham

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Good question Karysa. Thanks for coming by?

elingregory said...

Very conflicted. Poor Jim.

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Thanks for coming by Elin

sarahballance said...

Very well written, Sherry!

Sherry Gloag said...

:-) Thanks Sarah.