3 February 2013

FB- SSS 03/02/13

Before I post my offering for the first facebook Six Sunday Sentence, I'd like to thank all those who gave us the original SSS. Following and often participating made me 'see' my own writing in a different light while learning and enjoying reading everyone elses too.

So today I am offering six sentences from my first  Valentine Rom Com novella, The Wrong Target, which is avaialable at Amazon, UK  kobo

“What’s wrong?” He cringed at the pleading in his voice.

“Wrong?” Sheila lowered the paper and offered him a scathing glance at him. “Why would you think something’s wrong when I’m not allowed to leave this crummy flat and have no one to talk to while you’re at your office all day?”With a flick of her finger, she dismissed the seven-million-pound penthouse suite as beneath contempt.

You can find more offerings over at the new FB group Six Sunday Sentence

32 comments:

ClareMDavidson said...

Not sure if it swallowed my first comment or not. Just in case it did, I'll try again!

An intriguing six sentences. I want to know why Sheila isn't allowed to leave the flat (and why she doesn't anyway, if he's out at work all day). It's interesting that he seems to want to placate her.

You don't need "at him" at the end of the second sentence :)

Sherry Gloag said...

Thanks for your comment, and I agree, I don't need 'ta him' and yet read over it so many times and would have conitnued to do so :-) So thanks for that.

Debbie D. said...

Sounds like the lament of a kept woman. Interesting; makes me want to read more.
Cheers!

Elaine Cantrell said...

Curious. Why can't she go out?

Ann Swann said...

Haha! Crummy seven-million-pound penthouse! She is not a happy camper! I'll be back to find out why...

Unknown said...

Wow! a seven million dollar penthouse. Great hook. Look forward to reading more. :-)

Karysa Faire said...

Can I change places with her? :-) Please? Fun snippet--I want to know more!

Sarah W said...

Just a bird in a gilded cage, hmmm?

More, please!

Paula Martin said...

Great snippet. Now I need to know why she's not allowed to leave!

Teresa Cypher said...

Good snippet, Sherry. It's so hard to tell from six sentences,, but I'm not sure I like her. Ahh, but characters are fun to redeem after they've behaved badly. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I want to know more too, so that's a great hook! Nice to meet you.

I'm taking a week off from SSS, but I'll be back somehow one of these weekends...

Unknown said...

Hi Sherry! There's lots said in that snippet - why can't she leave the flat and...and...she's flipping the bird at a seven million pound penthouse? Crikey - great snippet

Gem Sivad said...

She's a bit of a snark isn't she? He seems frightened of her. Very intriguing.

FCEtier said...

So who's the prisoner here?
Just because he can leave and she cannot...

Monica Enderle Pierce said...

I'll second Frank's question. Exactly who's imprisoned here?

Anonymous said...

Well she hasn't got much imagination. Given a 7 million pound penthouse i reckon i could amuse myself for hours just doing Eartha Kitt impersonations. Sad that he seems so besotted with her. Nice snippet.

SherryGLoag said...

Thanks for coming by Debbie. It is his daughter who is winging. She's just been grounded until H*** freezes over.

SherryGLoag said...

She broke every rule in her life pretty much so Dad had to take a stand! Thanks for coming by Elaine.

SherryGLoag said...

LOL Ann, it was the only way I could think of to get across the worth of my hero. Thanks for coming by.

SherryGLoag said...

LOL Branda, thanks for coming by, and I'm delighted this caught your interest.

SherryGLoag said...

ROFL Karysa, me too as long as I had a computer!

SherryGLoag said...

A very naughty bird in the cage, sarah :-)

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Paula, Sheila broke every rule in her life so Dad came down hard on her. Not that either of them are ahppy about it. :-) Thanks for coming by.

SherryGLoag said...

Teresa, I didn't like her while I wrote it and it was quite hard to redeem her and the reasons for her actions in a believable manner. While she's not the heroine of the story, she is a pivitol character. Thanks for coming by.

SherryGLoag said...

:-)Welcome kelworthfiles, it's great to meet you too. Thanks for coming by and sharing your thoughts.

SherryGLoag said...

Hi Sue :-) Thanks for dropping in. She broke all the rules and her Dad is not a happy camper. I hope all's well with you?

SherryGLoag said...

:-) Gem I'm delighted you picked up on the undercurrents. She's his teenage daughter... Do I need to say more?!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SherryGLoag said...

Well spotted Frank. In different ways they are both prisoners of events. Thanks for dropping by.

SherryGLoag said...

Monica, it is the hero's daughter who is giving him grief, so she's grounded rather than a prisoner. But trying telling that to Sheila! LOL

SherryGLoag said...

I so agree Elin. I reckon I could keep myself occupied in a flat like that too!
Thanks for coming by.

Anonymous said...

This is interesting on sooo many levels. You've painted an incredible picture here in just six sentences!

Sherry Gloag said...

Thanks for your kind words, Sarah. I'm pleased you enjoyed it.